Our Twitter Report

Fair Use of image claimed for purposes of self-reference; humorous reference

Our Twitter Report: Not exactly a definition, but we did have a tweet read exclusively Friday, May 14, 2010 by KeithOlbermann on "The Twitter Report" during MSNBC Countdown.
Keith referred to our avatar as President Garfield.  "Is that President Garfield?  President Garfield is tweeting us?"  Then he did his humorous voice "President Garfield here!". We loved it.  (It's actually Benjamin Harrison.  Keith - we love you!)



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Shwitter

Twitter Paper Bird Toy Image  licensed under Creative Commons by Nereski

Shwitter: http://bit.ly/dnr9D0 The unfortunate portmanteau of shutdown and Twitter and/or the 4letter word for the release of biological waste...like what happened to Twitter yesterday...  What you call a social networking site when it takes a dump on you...

FOM: Some Users Experiencing Frozen Timelines (March 14)



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Twown

Darkly humorous ironic image licensed under Creative Commons by TRAFFIK [US]

Twown: The unfortunate portmanteau of Twitter and drown. Literally, to be 'drowning' in tweets.


Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/bXjddY


Example: 150 new tweets!? Help, I'm Twowning!









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Tweetable or Twitterable

Tweetable or Twitterable: The quality of expressing a message in quantity of 140 characters or less.

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/a2hoCI

FOM: Twitter (Wikilink)

Please note: This definition may not be "original".





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Twitterific!

Twitterific!: Unfortunate portmanteau of Twitter and terrific. What you tell your 'tweeps' when they ask how you're doing but you don't feel that great about things...ehhh, not so much...

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/dzSKyh





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Twidiot

Twidiot: The unfortunate portmanteau of Twitter and idiot. To paraphrase Forrest Gump (the novel, by Winston Groom...not the film...)..."Life is like a box of tweets, you never know what you're gonna get".

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/9uTVh7





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TwitFame or CXLame

TwitFame or CXLame: The unfortunate conceptual collision of Twitter or 140 (Roman Numerals) and fame. To paraphrase Andy Warhol, "In the future, everybody will be famous for 140 characters".

Everyone desires some measure of fame (or mercy) - its human nature.

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/dCqaKs






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Tweffect or Twitter Effect

Fair Use for Reference; Humor Image licensed under Creative Commons by Todd Barnard

Tweffect or Twitter Effect: The unfortunate realization one gets when one realizes it is more fun to screw around on Twitter than to accomplish something.


Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/8xB7tT


Follow us on Twitter....sigh... or Plurk...





FOM: Those Less Motivated to Achieve Will Excel on Tasks Seen as Fun

Hart et al. The effects of chronic achievement motivation and achievement primes on the activation of achievement and fun goals. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2009; 97 (6): 1129 DOI: 10.1037/a0017146









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Phwitter or Sophister?

Plato and Aristotle image licensed under Creative Commons by Image Editor

Phwitter or Sophister?: The portmanteaus of philosophy and Twitter. Which is the more appropriate? The former, being the joining of love (philo) and twitter - or the latter, being the joining of knowledge (sophia) and twitter.


Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/5hWjyu


FOM: Impossible Tweets, This is Not a Posting – Impossible Tweets, “Define Normal” and "Where is the Universe?".









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Twitter...

Twitter: (Can be) a quiet, intellectual conversation… or NOT!!!

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/5yqp2E

FOM: Twitter Declared Most Popular English Word of 2009





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Twitaddiction II (The Not-So-Subtle Signs...)

Twitaddiction (Not-So-Subtle): Not-So-Subtle Signs You Might Be A TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while parallel parking, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted during a pelvic exam, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted during a colonoscopy, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7 (*"Worse if you're the MD").

If you have ever tweeted in a bidet, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while nursing a baby, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while changing a personal diaper, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while inserting/removing a rectal thermometer, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while a cop wrote you a traffic ticket, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while your wife gave birth, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while hanggliding or flying a plane, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while unblocking a toilet, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted during a funeral procession, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted while putting on a condom, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

If you have ever tweeted during oral sex, you might be a TwitAddict http://bit.ly/4EItD7

Apologies, again, to Jeff Foxworthy...

Please note: This posting appears simultaneously on our sister publication, Meditations on Life's Meaning.

Bit.ly link to this posting: http://bit.ly/4UWsMG

*Thanks to Alan Colmes and Politisite. Updated: Thursday, January 7, 2010.






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Twoze

Twoze: The unfortunate portmanteau of Twitter and froze. To describe your frozen Twitter page.

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/8P1IAM




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Twitaddiction or Twitaddict

Twitaddiction or Twitaddict: The unfortunate portmanteau of Twitter or tweet and addiction. (1) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself tweeting every day of the week.
(2) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself tweeting every trending topic that you twead.
(3) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself defining new words based on trending topics in Twitter (Like these guys...sigh).
(4) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself debating whether twitaddict has 2 t's or 3.
(5) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself tweeting while incarcerated.
(6) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself giving up booze, beer and wine for Twitter.
(7) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself tweeting and driving.
(8) You might be a twitaddict if you plan your day's activities around Twitter.
(9) You might be a twitaddict if the kids are late for school because you were on Twitter.
(10) You might be a twitaddict if you tweeted all day and got no work done at the job!
(11) You might be a twitaddict if you tweet in the restroom.
(12) You might be a twitaddict if you find yourself 'managing your brand' on Twitter even though you don't have one.
Apologies to Jeff Foxworthy...

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/5Bz1qf

FOM: Results for #twitaddict on Twitter.






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Twasting

Image licensed under Creative Commons by {Balázs}

Twasting: The unfortunate portmanteau of Twitter and wasting (time). And, we're still doing it...

Actually, you might be wasting more than time, see the link below...

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/3F9skJ

Updated: Facebook’s fantasy games cost more than time

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Zwitter

Image licensed under Creative Commons by cjc4454

Zwitter: The portmanteau of zen and Twitter. The discussion of zen on Twitter. Can you describe all reality and time in a single tweet?

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/LhQV1

"Related": Zwitterion (Why is this related?...)

FOM: Collective Subconscious.2 , Zen to Go (Google Books) and Tweality.

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Collective Subconscious.2

Mysterious Cloud image licensed under Creative Commons by bionicteaching

Collective Subconscious.2: Last night we were dreaming of Twitter (again!). Does the dream state indicate that Twitter has become a new part of our collective subconscious? Or, has Twitter inadvertently tapped into some sort of collective subconscious? Can Twitter become some sort of gateway to the 'Oversoul'? In this way, does Twitter connect to a higher spiritual plane? In this way, can Twitter point us to our 'spiritual home'?

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/1DUr31

FOM: Collective subconscious, Spiritual Plane , Dharma Wheel and The Over-Soul (Essays by Emerson)









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Tweaver or Twastor

Image licensed under Creative Commons by fauxto_digit

Tweaver / Twastor: The portmanteau of Twitter with beaver and Castor. To communicate via twitter or texting or some other hi-tech method with beavers, wildlife and so on...


Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/JaADP


FOM: New Yorkers text hi-tech beavers










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Twitjunction or Twinjunction

Dave Letterman theater on Broadway 3 Image licensed under Creative Commons by carldunniii

Twitjunction / Twinjunction: The unfortunate portmanteau of Twitter and injunction. To process/post any court order via Twitter or other social networking site. (Perhaps David Letterman would have done better to take this route?...).

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/14sgXX

FOM: Court order served over Twitter








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Twamp or Twurb

Twamp / Twurb: The portmanteau of clamp(down) or curb and Twitter. To shut down or curb the privelege and access to Twitter and/or other social websites.

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/daYsX

FOM: Texas Tech Coach Clamps Down on Twitter and NBA Dumps Tweeting, Social Media During Games (from ESPN)

Updated/Revised: Thursday, October 1, 2009

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Twize or Tworry

Image licensed under Creative Commons by Chrysaora

Twize / Tworry: The portmanteau of Twitter and apologize or sorry. To apologize for Twaboos.

Bit.ly: http://bit.ly/eaeUg

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